Can i have a private post please??? Im sat here balling my eyes out shaking in a…

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Can i have a private post please???
Im sat here balling my eyes out shaking in anger and i just dont know what to do anymore. My partner expects me to do everything. Weve got a nearly 19 month old and i struggle with depression and anxiety. I find it hard most days to do day to day tasks but i try to for my son. Todays just been a mess. My partner fell asleep on the sofa whilst we had guests round and didnt even care. He then stopped me from taking our little boy to see my dad for a bit necause apparently he was too tired when really he just couldnt be arsed in helping him get ready. I broke down infront of him and he didn’t care/doesnt show that he cares about me or my feels. I went upstairs to calm down ive come down 4 hours later the living room is even messier than it was before nothings been done to it he was fast asleep again on the sofa with the living room door unlocked. I then panicked because i coukdnt find the keys to lock the door and i cant sleep at night knowing the doors unlocked i just domt feel safe im way too paranoid. I asked him to help me look for the living him knowing full well how scared i get and a he refused. Ive just lost it with him. Its so close to christmas and i really dont want to split up because i love him so much but he isnt making any effort in the relationship whatsoever.
I domt really know what im asking if im honest….
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