Can I have an anonymous post please? I’m with my partner 3 years now we have pla…

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Can I have an anonymous post please? I’m with my partner 3 years now we have planned out having our baby together and moving in together , I have become so addicted to him that I can only ever see my future with him. He’s the only person I have ever felt comfterble with as I find it very hard to be myself around anyone and don’t think I have the courage in myself to ever find that with anyone else I suffer badly from pannick attacks. He has broken my heart and done things behind my back very early in the relationship and I took him back but we have never had any problems since with other girls etc…. so I felt it was the right decision but I’ve never let go of the paranoia I want him beside me 24/7 and I know that’s not healthy but I’m happiest and most relaxed when we’re together , I freak out id he goes to his friends because they all seem to be bad influences and he ends up in trouble or oweing money etc…. so tonight we had a row because he had friends texting to see if he wanted to hang and I’m not fond of these. He promised me that he wasn’t going to hang with them that he was exausated and going home to bed. He looked me in the eyes and told me not to worry or stress that he was going to bed usually would be staying together but as I have to be up early for work we decided to stay apart tonight as times are tough saving for our own place. Then I find out he did go to the friends that he promised he wasn’t and looked me in the eyes and said he would mail me when he gets to bed. I feel betrayed that I can’t trust him to tell me what he’s doing that he feels its okay and normal to lie to me without feeling any guilt. How can I have a future with him and raise our kids if he can lie to me so easily? Or am I just being a paranoid wreck and do I need to lay off a little? No abuse please just need some honest answer because I love this guy with all my heart and have not got it in me to walk away I know it would destroy me but what should I do? As I’ve become so unbelievably attached that it frightens me?


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