Hey there was wondering if I could have a private post please. It’s a sensitive …
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Hey there was wondering if I could have a private post please. It’s a sensitive subject. Please bare with me.
I don’t want to be posting this as I feel horrible as it is, but has anyone suffered from gender disappointment? My mental health worker said she is watching me and said that it will pass. But I wasn’t expecting it when I found out I was having a little boy in the scan room I was ecstatic! So happy the relief I felt when I heard the heartbeat and was told everything seems to be growing perfectly! And that we were going to be having a little boy! Who made it very clear wangling his little bits around!
Since finding out I told my family. Who all reacted really badly as they all wanted a girl as I’m the only one out of all of the kids!
We then went baby shopping and they were all still picking up girls clothes. Still saying the name I would have picked for a girl ignoring the fact that I’m now having a little boy and not being able to accept it.
Since then my partner has said I’ve seemed distant from the baby and distant in myself and he is really worried and I wasn’t even aware until both him and my worker pointed it out. What can I do to stop it. I was so happy and now I just feel numb to everything. And I know I’m horrible for feeling this way. But I don’t know what I’m feeling. Im so confused. Sorry for the rant.
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Firstly, congratulations. I suffered with gender disappointment with my fourth child. I found it really difficult to except what we were having as I was soo sure I was having the opposite sex. Even my family were. Then I started to be ok with it but every time I felt any closer to being happy I kept getting comments like don’t you wish you were having a boy, or your poor husband etc. (I had 4 girls) Lots of hurting comments that made it difficult to suppress my feelings. And everyone around me were having boys. Though as soon as she was born I’ve never even had one thought of wishing she was a boy. I had a great bond from day one and very happy. Your feelings will pass and as hard as it is now it will get better xx
It seems to me that it’s your family that can’t accept your baby being a boy not you! In my personal opinion I think it’s them that need a talking to as it’s because their non acceptance that’s making you feel the way you do at the moment.
If you go baby shopping with them again take them to the boys clothes section and ask them to help suggest names for your baby BOY not girl! If they refuse to accept it then I suggest you distance yourself from them and focus on the baby you’re bringing into the world.
Gender disappointment is real and fairly common but seems to me in this situation that the disappointment you feel stems more from your family’s non acceptance of the gender you’re expecting.
You’re going to love that baby whatever the gender and your family needs to accept it too or back off
So sorry your feeling this way but you shouldn’t worry about what other people say about the sex of your baby, no one chooses what they have and at the end if the day as long as you and your boy are healthy and happy that’s all that matters hun, you and your partner are all the love needed for your boy and maybe once he is here everyone else will come around if not it’s their loss and try not to worry too much think of all that’s to come 🙂 x
It doesn’t matter if your family wanted a girl unfortunately the sex of a baby is something we cannot control. Just be proud of your self growing a baby. A lovely little boy who is your son. When you meet him the love will be there.
Try to put aside what others are saying and imagine the day you meet your boy
I felt like that when I found out the gender I have 3 boys and really wanted a girl as it was my last chance I’m now having another boy took a while to rebond and love him but u will I did x
I don’t know how you feel but wanted to say don’t be bothered about others opinions. I had a few unwanted opinions with my first but I ignored them. It’s your baby & let yourself enjoy him 💙 Congratulations🎉 I have 2 & boys are so loving! I’d say for you to go baby shopping again, take your partner and pick some lovely boy stuff without the hassle of anyone around you ❤️ enjoy it! 👶🏼
Wen we found out we were having a boy, I was in a right foul mood for the rest of the day. I sulked and hardly spoke to anyone. Don’t beat urself up about it 🙂 xxx
I had it a bit with this one this one is a girl which will be my 3rd girl I really wanted a boy but came round now and have pink every thing ul love him no matter what
I was the same as you i had 3boys and was wanting a little girl my fourth was a little boy i was dissapointed at first but i wouldnt have changed him for the world i am so proud of all my sons xxx
As long as your baby is healthy and your happy , ignore all the negative remarks and enjoy your little boy when he arrives , you love your child regardless of whether it’s a boy or a girl . 💙