Hi can I have a private post please? I’ve got an 8m old baby,I breast fed for 5…

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Hi can I have a private post please?

I’ve got an 8m old baby,I breast fed for 5 weeks (well,expressed as couldn’t feed by breast as she was prem)
This has never really bothered me until today….
I saw a mum breastfeeding her newborn,and inside I was burning with jealousy….I wanted to break down in tears as I sat feeding my baby formula…All I wanted to do was breastfeed my baby and I couldn’t even manage one feed,It’s never bothered me this much before,but it really hurt me today,I wanted to cry as I fed my baby that formula knowing how badly I wanted to breastfeed and I still do…part of me wants another baby in future,not just so I can breastfeed,but part of me feels like I’m a failure for feeding formula…it’s nothing against other ff mums it’s just I feel awful I couldn’t breastfeed when I’d dreamt about breastfeeding my baby and having the closest bond possible…I love her to pieces and I’m glad she’s getting what she needs but today I just felt overwhelming jealousy like never before….I don’t know what the point of this post is tbh I guess I just need to get it off my mind…

– yes I’m diagnosed with PND and I have medication before anyone says “you should see your doctor”


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9 COMMENTS

  1. I’m the same, my little boy is also 8 months and although i managed to breast feed him for 5 days, it turns out I wasn’t producing enough milk and he ended up having to go to hospital so i had to stop. I expressed what i could but it took hours to get a couple of ounces so switched to formula. I often get annoyed with myself and feel such a failure as a mother but then i think. I did what was best for my baby. Breast is not always best. I chose time with my baby over sitting for hours expressing a tiny amount. I have just been diagnosed as PND too

  2. I have had two prem babies, I tried breast feeding with both, it failed with both for one reason or another, formula milk is brilliant and there is nothing to be ashamed about using it! Don’t get down about it, if your baby is healthy and happy that’s all that matters! Xx

  3. Dont beat yourself up.. we all do what is best for us and our babies… 5 weeks pumping is bloody amazing, sounds to me like you just needed more support as prem babies can/do latch just needs encouraging 🙂 relactating is definitely possible if thats what you would like to do??

  4. Don’t put your self down you pump for 5 weeks that’s amazing Hun you are great mum regardless how you fed your baby I bet there love n cared for Hun you are doing amazing job well done you but if you want to bf again agree with the mummies above me skin to skin n you can get something from holland and Barrett to help as well 😘😘😘 xxxxx

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