This poem is what my then 12-year-old wrote for a school project
“Tick tock…tick tock…
Life is counting down on my internal clock.
People I once knew
walk by without a clue what I’m thinking in my head.
The times we once shared
exist as if you were never there.
People don’t know I’ll soon say my last goodbye.
How I miss the way I used to feel on Christmas day when Santa was real.
But back to reality…back to today, my mind is like a river which I cannot dam, I love my mum but I can’t go on
Tick tock…tick tock.. my clock has to stop.
I need to find away to end my life today, tick tock!!!!”.
The school called me to tell me about it, I rushed to the school to see my daughter, to talk to her to hold her, just to be with her.
My daughter broke down in the deputy heads office she was a broken girl, she didn’t know why she felt this way, she just said she was sad all the time and couldn’t get suicide out of her head.
How do you fix this? How do you make things better? What have I done wrong to make my daughter feel so worthless?
Two years of counselling, two years of watching over my daughter constantly, worrying constantly that my daughter would take her life.
Her Doctor said that Estrogen, a female sex hormone, has consistently been linked to depression. Estrogen levels dramatically increase in girls during puberty, this can cause depression and suicidal thoughts.
My daughter is now 14 and a confident, semi moody teenager, she hasn’t had suicidal thoughts for quite some time and I think she has found herself but I still worry, if you have a son or daughter who you are worried about please seek help, be it the school, the doctors or outside authorities, had she not wrote her thoughts in poem form my daughter may not still be here today.
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