Can I have a private post please. Sorry for the long post but here goes I’m rea…

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Can I have a private post please. Sorry for the long post but here goes 😞 I’m really struggling. My eldest turned 6 recently. Generally, he’s a good boy. He hit the terrible twos at 15 months and we had about a year where it was awful. Things settled down and he was the happiest, craziest little guy I knew. The ages of 3&4 were amazing. When he turned five, he started to act out. And gradually, over time things got worse. We’re now at the stage where he literally does not listen to a word I say, he argues with me relentlessly like he’s 15, he lashed out and hits me, if I send him to his room to calm down he destroys the room, punches walls, doors etc, smacks himself in the face repeatedly while screaming he wants to die and he hates his life, he hates me and his brother, he hates school he hates life. In school he’s doing amazing, across the board 5 stars. Sun shines out his tiny butt. As soon as he comes home, it’s horrendous. It’s like jeckle and Hyde .. other people are starting to see it now too no one believed me at first. While I was pregnant with my other son he literally set about me punching my stomach, kicking, scratching, biting. I’d grabbed his wrists to stop him hitting my stomach and he used all his strength to lift himself up and kicked my bump full force, I dropped him and he fell back. I’ve had meetings with the teacher, the head teacher, the home-school link worker, and they all assure me it’s either all in my head or it’s my parenting. My parenting? He’s never been a spoiled child, we have good routine and structure, he does social activities at weekends etc, gets out to play. He used to be such a HAPPY little boy and it’s although it just changed one day. I’m so frustrated. He’s always high as a kite, never sits at peace – but as soon as I challenge him on it he snaps. Doing homework is an issue, eating dinner is an issue, going to bed is an issue, the wind changing direction is an issue. It takes ANYTHING to set him off. He’s extremely tactile with certain behaviours too. He’s stopped playing with toys but NEEDS the comfort of small fidgety toys he can hold in one hand, keep in his pocket etc. I’ve been to the GP who referred him for assessment and the centre refused to see him saying his needs aren’t severe enough. I then went back to the gp to ask for help again and got given the number for social services and was told “it isn’t a medical issue” . There is SOMETHING and I can’t put my finger on it but I need someone to help me I’m literally on the edge. I dread collecting him from school at 3pm. He’s been hit already but it’s literally going to take my 4month old baby to be really hurt for them to take it serious??
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