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Can you do me a private post please, my 2nd baby was born 2 months premature and…

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Can you do me a private post please, my 2nd baby was born 2 months premature and ever since her birth I haven’t felt right she’s 8 months old now and I feel like I may have pnd and have probably had it for a long time. Because she is prem I spent a lot of time sleeping and staying with her in hospitals so I never got the appointment to check if mums have pnd I don’t feel I have a bond with her well not much of one anyways I love her bit when she cries or twist my heart starts to race and I just want to run away💔, I realise this sounds awful so please no bashing I want some genuine advice so I know if I should seek out help I have a history of mental health problems but I don’t feel like it’s that I just want some help I feel so lost😭 iv tried to talk to my partner but it hasn’t helped me. Thanks for reading and thanks for any advice yous have to offer
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