Could I have a private post please? I’ve got a 4 month old baby that was 8 weeks…

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Could I have a private post please? I’ve got a 4 month old baby that was 8 weeks prem, ever since he was born I’ve been struggling with how I’m feeling. At first I blamed it on him being premature and everything happening so quick in the end, then blamed it on him having to stay in hospital, he’s then just been given lactose free milk as he’s got an allergy which I spent 3 months fighting for (constant screaming for 3 whole months) but now he’s a lovely happy little baby and I’m still feeling down, the past week or so I’ve started to feel really anxious too, paranoid about the door having to be locked, hearing people outside my house makes me want to be sick, feel unsafe in my own house which I have no reason for! My partners said all along he’s thought I have postnatal depression but I’ve never seen it like that just thought I was stressed with everything.I love being a mum and love my little boy to bits. I’m going to the doctors today so don’t want anyone to tell me that.. so what I’m asked is for people to share experiences, will it still count as that or would it just be normal depression now he’s 4 months old? Have a history of depression and had to stop taking my pills when I found out I was pregnant.

Sorry for the long post & thanks for reading xx
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