Eating Disorder Awareness
Trigger warning ❤️🖤💜
So, this week is eating disorder awareness week. Every year I do a post on my experience with an eating disorder as I think it is incredibly important we raise awareness and offer support to those who struggle.
For those who don’t know I had anorexia when I was 15 years old (around that age). I was in recovery for two years with a counsellor – at one point they wanted to admit me to hospital to be tube fed however my mum took the time out of her life to care for me 24/7 at home to feed me as well as monitor my health, see this is the other thing people don’t realise, it’s not just the appearance anorexia or any eating disorder effects it is the internal damage.
I was high risk of a heart attack, had constant tummy and chest pains as well as having to have weekly/fortnightly blood tests to check all was functioning normally. Despite all of this I still wanted to loose weight. Fast forward to now I still struggle with body image, I’m sure most people get sick of hearing me say I need to loose weight or I’m fat, but to me this is really.
I don’t see my body how others see it, in fact I’m the heaviest I’ve been in years and that is a huge daily battle. I am incredibly grateful to my body for growing and birthing two gorgeous boys however I still hate myself for many different reasons always wishing I looked different or could change things about me.
Although my story is of my battle with anorexia I have also come across people on my journey who have a different eating disorder, some you would have no idea struggles, this is the thing not all disorders are visible so please be kind and offer support because trust me living with a demon like this is awful and it never goes away, you just learn to accept it as the new you. My inbox is always open to anyone struggling, please seek the help you need ❤️
I do not have any photos of myself from ten years ago however the photo on the left is me after I split from my ex, I saw myself as fat and hated myself. I look back at that image and wish I was like that now instead of the weight I am but I know it’s not healthy in reality.
