Here’s Why Facebook Annoys Me
Facebook piss offs:
1) Men pouting in photos, girls look ridiculous enough, but lads….fucking stop it.
2) Girls with Ming from Flash Gordon eyebrows. Eyebrows are meant to deflect water from your eyes, they are NOT supposed to have corners….
3) People who write billy big bollocks statuses like….”to the man in the shop who just stood on my toe, it’s a good job u had ur kids with u or I’d have knocked u out!” Or “to the woman in the green corsa who cut me up earlier then smiled at me at the lights, it’s a good job the lights changed cos I was gonna get out and kick u square in the minge!”…. Firstly they won’t see that status because you don’t know them, secondly, why are you making out like you’d show any aggression towards them? You clearly said absolutely nothing to them, then ran home to write a status about what you would have done if you had some bollocks….
4) 30+ year old men describing good things as “sick”… Grow up…
5) Young people using Americanisms, like.. “We got a cab home and made out..” No mate, you fingered her in a taxi….
6) “New hair” posts…it’s not fucking new hair, it’s your same old hair just shorter and laced with chemicals to make it the same colour as whichever pretty celeb you’re trying to copy… And by the way, she looks nice with red hair…you look like a tool.
7) Overnight nutritionists…I’m glad you recently discovered health and fitness 4 months ago, but knowing that chicken and rice is good clean food, doesn’t mean you should post pics of your 8 prepped meals online every morning and preach how we should all be eating just that. Some of us like pizza thanks! Fuck off!!
😎 People who post updates like “what time does the co-op open?” You clearly have internet access… Google it you fucking cabbage!!!
9) THIS!!!! Status: “completely devastated”
What’s up babe?
U ok Hun?
What’s happened?
“I’ve inboxed you….”
You nob….that’s all.
10) Pics of girls legs in the bath, just short of their tuppence…just pack it in, you attention seeking whore. The post isn’t about… “peace at last”… It’s about, “I’m naked and gagging for cock, inbox me”.
