Hi can I have a private post please. I am currently having to live at my mums wi…
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Hi can I have a private post please. I am currently having to live at my mums with my 3 year old daughter after losing our home. The other night my daughter and my almost 5 year old brother was in the bath and I noticed my mum wasn’t in there with them so as I walked closer to the door I could hear my little brother whispering asking my daughter to keep turning around, so as I poked my head around the corner I saw my daughter stood up and my brother had his face in her bum and his hand between her legs, he quickly moved and said he wasn’t doing anything, I grabbed my daughter out the bath and told my mum who doesn’t seem bothered by it what so ever. My other siblings have never been the best behaved children and I was left to live with my nan at the age of 10 because my mum moved away, so I’ve never really been here longer than a week at a time. My little brother is a horrible child to my daughter and is constantly taking things away from her, standing in her way so she can’t get past(the other day she was in the put up pool and he was stood on the stairs not letting her get out) pushing her out of her seat so he can sit there, taking toys away from her, if she asks for something he then demands it and always gets it, whether it be a pair of shoes, the last snack, a toy. He can never sit there and just play with her, he always wants what she has and if she says no he tries to say ‘let me show you, let me help you’ to take it away from her. He kicks,throws things and hits her. If I ask my daughter not to do something he will then do it so she copies and he doesn’t stop. I’ve also noticed that he will jump on the swing, slide, bike or whatever when He sees her running towards it, but because he’s got on it first I give him the benefit of the doubt and say to my daughter to wait her turn obviously she’s getting angrier and angrier so when I tell her off and she starts to cry he will then just jump of as if he was waiting for her to get shouted at. There is so many things but my mum never seems to bat an eyelid and always says it’s just kids and she’s even told me to let them work things out for themselves to the point he is beating my daughter up for a wellie boot that she has on that he decides he wants. I’m so stressed out and have no where to go. My daughter is learning the behavior and is ignoring me just as much as my brother does to my mum but the thing is my mum does nothing in punishment wise, she will say she will and he just turns around and says ‘no you won’t I’ll run away from you so you can’t get me’ and that’s the end of it. Am I over reacting here? Because my mum seems to think I am.😔
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And could you also add that He has a strange obsession with her nappies, whenever I’m changing her he will come and watch And ask what she’s done and doesn’t stop looking at her bits, I try to block his eye view but he just moves. X
Could you reply to my post please. I have tried my hardest to talk to her but she just has a breakdown about how her kids can never get along (I have 2 brothers and one sister all from my step dad, a step dad who has never cared or looked after me since I was 3. When I was younger my first brother used to watch the way he treated me and copied, and so on) if I step in then my step dad will get involved and start having a go at me for punishing his children even though he or my mum are just no watching what they are doing, he does it to the point that he tells me to go home and then my little sister and brother will start copying telling me to go home and they don’t like me and my step dad will just sit there and smirk while my mum is just outside away from it. There is nothing I can do because as soon as I do I get in trouble, and has been the reason for me always going home after a week of being here every time I have come down to visit, but now we’re having to live here I can’t do anything 😔 xx
You’re definitely not over reacting. That bath situation would have me questioning what is going on in that boys head.
Can’t you speak to your health visitor and explain what has been happening since you moved in? Surely they will agree you need to be rehoused as that is not the right environment for your little girl. I agree with Leah, he is definitely a bully and being around him could end up damaging your daughter both physically and emotionally in the future.
Good luck, hope you get sorted. X
I don’t think you are over reacting and he needs to be taught about the no touching business ,I wouldn’t have let that go ,I know kids are inquisitive etc but it needs be put firmly in place now that there are rules with private parts ,also for him to understand it’s not ok for people to touch him there too .
The kid needs boundaries and will be a much kinder child for it .Tell your mum that if you are there and he is doing wrong and if affecting your daughter that you will be telling him off too ,she needs to step up and be a parent first instead of his friend x
You are not overreacting but the kid is only 5 years old. Your mum doesn’t sound like she has given him any boundaries and if she doesn’t he may not change as he gets older. I wouldn’t leave your daughter unsupervised in his company and would have a chat with your mum stating you will be treating both the kids the same from now on. With boundaries and guidance in place his behaviour should improve
That’s awful! I think you need to try keep your wee brother away from your little girl, certainly should not be sharing a bath. Your Mum needs to listen to you and have a good talk with your brother. Good luck x
Considering the age of your brother and daughter they are acting normal…like siblings. ..your mother not disciplining your brother when necessary is an issue….you may have to do that when you see it …it’s a hard thing as you are living with them ….
I don’t think you’re over reacting at all.
Don’t leave him anywhere near her unsupervised and don’t let them bathe together.
Could be ‘innocent’ kid stuff (the bath) but you never know.
He sounds like a bully and your mums just leaving him to it
A little concerning that a 3 and 5 year old are left on their own in the bath. :/
Your brother is going to be trouble in a few years of your mother doesn’t do what she should be doing..
How’s she overreacting !!!! I would go off my fucking head 😡😡😡😡😡😡
Little shit needs a good telling off! What a brat