I won’t feel guilty for doing nothing with my son.
During the holidays social media is filled with photos of parents and carers taking their kids out places. Everyday seems to have a new adventure. I used to think I was a bad mum if I didn’t do this, now I realise it’s the opposite.
My son can’t cope with endless days out. What may be a neurotypical child’s heaven could be my son’s hell. He likes time at home and more than that, he needs it.
We are lucky enough to have a large garden and I realise how blessed we are to have this space. When we spend the day in the garden I’m not being a lazy parent, I’m proactively giving my son time to process and regulate. The holidays mean we are out of routine and this can be a lot for him to cope with. Some days he just needs his iPad. This is not lazy parenting, this is understanding his needs.
I’ve been told in the past that my son doesn’t have ADHD, I just don’t take him out enough. Comments like this wash over me now but in the early days I used to get really upset.
Parenting a neurodiverse child in the holidays is a completely different kettle of fish to parenting a neurotypical one. Endless days out will not lead to a tired, happy child but an overstimulated and dysregulated child.
We have plans tomorrow and kiddo went out yesterday. Today we are having a rest day at home.
Don’t feel guilty for having calm days with no exciting adventures out and about. Our kids need them more than we realise.