Please can I have a private post Well we’re I start I don’t know I messed up ba…

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Please can I have a private post 😊
Well we’re I start I don’t know I messed up bad 2 years ago I met the man that u always wanted he took me and my two baby’s on helped all the time night feeds the lot basically I was madly in love with him he also got on one knee and popped the question to wich I said yes ! I also found out that I was pregnant soon as I turned 10 weeks everything changed I couldn’t stand it when he touched me everything he did really annoyed me I’d turn down making love with him and got myself in a really horrible place till the point I went and had an abortion I just felt I wasn’t ready for another baby specially when I had feelings that I didn’t want to be with him after talking to him I decided that he should find someone that made him happy and a few months later he had a new gf to now they are married and happy why 2 years later do I feel so guilty I Stoll love that man I know I don’t deserve to say that I still love him but that’s the life I have always wanted married with my kids and I would of had another and been married to him by now. Now all I have is to look at his Facebook and see pics of him I’m depressed and feel very sad I know it’s my own fault as I chucked it all away but how do I stop these feelings that I love him still I havnt told anyone as I know he is happy so I wouldn’t tell him just need help with how to cope as the last few weeks all I have done is watch his Facebook listen to the songs we both listened to and I just jeep feeling so down he is always on my mind 😔 please no nasty comments as I know it is my own fault for recking what we had .
Many thanks in advance for people that will comment and help it’s much appreciated x
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