Ppp i got sexually abused by my grandad when i was 13 years old, ive been in a r…

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Ppp i got sexually abused by my grandad when i was 13 years old, ive been in a relationship with my bf for nearly 10 years and we have children together, he was touching me up earlier which i didnt quite mind but after we had sex i felt really horrible inside and then when he went to kiss me i felt repulsed by it, it felt really dirty and sometimes i cant bare him touching me. I just dont know what to do, as i feel like ive been robbed of a normal sex life if that makes sense and im just beginning to hate men coming near me now, when i was at the doctors also the other week this old man came and sat down beside me and i felt very very uneasy i hated it, i just dont know what to do anymore 😭😭😭
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