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Needing a ppp? I’m feeling really down and I’m not sure if I should be feeling l…

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Needing a ppp?
I’m feeling really down and I’m not sure if I should be feeling like this needing advice off other mum’s.. my partner had been working away for months and only coming home on the weekends but recently he’s been coming home ever 2 weeks and all he does is sleep or play on the Xbox I have been very supportive and understanding that’s he’s working hard for us/ his family but he never texts or rings while he works away and we literally NEVER do anything we go on 1 holiday a year and that’s the most we see him. I just don’t see the point he works to support us be he earns alot of money and we never do anything with it I feel like I’m ungreatful for what he does but I get £50 a week and if to spend that on days out or if kids need anything and that’s all he has financial control over everything else .. I just expect more if he’s earning over £1000 a week I expect to be able to go on more holidays or even abroad or a nicer house than this crappy stuffy house we live in. I’m not allowed to get a job because he said it’s a waste of money because we would have to pay for child care .. am I just being selfish?
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