Can I have a private post please? Not sure if any of u remember my massive post at Christmas about my partner not spending any time with me and our 1 and 4 year old not working yet I paid nursery fees for the children and worked part time and studied a full time degree. Well I plucked up the courage and changed the locks when he went on a stag do 6weeks ago. Truth is he had been abusing me both physically and mentally for about 5 years. Always calling me fat and ugly (size10-12) thick(which is main reason I’m doing my degree and following my dreams whilst trying give my children a better life) he turned everyone against me his family my friends everyone fell for it. Well I was doing ok until today I treated myself to a hair cut (not had one in two years) and bam I got asked what the big cut on my scalp was from – a head injury from before xmas off him 😞 I’m enjoying not treading on egg shells now but I feel guilty when my oldest is crying for his dad and asking when he will see him yet he never shows up when he promises. How long goes it take to get easier? I go bed same time as my kids otherwise I just sit up thinking how did I let things get so bad? I feel I’ve let my children down although previously I used to cry in bed all night hoping my son hadn’t been lying in bed listening to the commotion crying. I know I’ll get through it just wondered how long til it starts becoming easier.