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Can I have a private post please, my husband of 4 years has walked out on me and…

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Can I have a private post please, my husband of 4 years has walked out on me and my 2 babies aged 1 and 2, there is no getting back together we was constantly arguing as he didnt trust me(I’ve never given him a reason not to), the thing is I cant stop thinking about him and im constantly crying all the time, he picked the kids up tonight all happy smiley and laughing like it hasnt effected him at all….he thinks its a joke to him to upset me…..think he gets a buzz out of it somehow, I have no family and only one close friend but she has a family of her own to look after, I just dont know what to do anymore because I really do still love him and cant stop thinking about him and so tempted to text or facebook him because I miss him so much, my kids go to bed at 7 and after that I start thinking about him because I feel so alone without him, how can I try and move forward and take my mind off thinking about him……..I just want my life back but cant see a way forward……..can anyone advise me a way to move forward please. Thanks
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