I Cried Happy Tears When I Gave My Baby A Bottle Of Formula

The first time I gave my baby a bottle of formula, I cried happy tears.

Big, overwhelming, uncontrollable…

Happy tears.

I couldn’t control the flow as the tears dripped down my face.

It was tears of pure love. Overwhelming love.

The decision to switch to formula was not an easy one to make. I felt the pressure over what I “should” do. I cried over it, worried over it, and did my research.

But then I prayed. And the answer was clear.

When I switched to formula, it was the first time I looked down at my baby while feeding and he was satisfied.

We did things we were never able to do while breastfeeding, because of my overwhelming letdown.

When I finally gave my baby a bottle of formula,

We snuggled.

We stopped during the feeding to talk, and jabber, and coo, and smile at one another.

He tried to grab my face.

I cleaned his crusty eyes and put lotion on his cheeks.

I kissed his forehead.

I smelled him and I breathed him in.

I was able to love him better, I was able to bond with him better.

And I cried happy tears.

It was the first feeding where he wasn’t crying and unsatisfied.

It was the first feeding where he looked at me with love instead of worry and tears.

It was relaxing.

It was loving.

My heart screamed with pure happiness.

So no.

No, I did not feed my baby “liquid gold” for long.

I’m not going to tell about all the reasons why, and all the struggles.

Because this is my motherhood.

I switched to formula.

And I cried happy tears.

I switched to formula, and I took my motherhood back.

I made it my own.

My own unique path.

So friend,

Make motherhood choices that are best for you and your babies…your kids.

Own your version of motherhood.

Own what’s right in your heart.

Own what fills you with peace.

Rather than asking the internet, or your friends.

Look up, and ask Him.

He knows your heart.

He knows your child.

He’s got the answers. .

Then own your motherhood.

*via Messy Footprints