Anonymous advice please I’m a mum of three Been with my partner 8 years now. 5 …

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Anonymous advice please
I’m a mum of three
Been with my partner 8 years now. 5 years ago while on a break up I was seeing another guy we never had sexual inter course or anything but he was there for me when I needed him.
Anyways 5 years on im back with my partner and have 3 beautiful children to him were engaged and due to be married in a couple of years. But for the pas 5 years this other man has always been there in the back of my mind anyone speaks his name it takes my breath he has a fiancé and she’s pregnant with his baby for 5 years iv not spoken a word never spoken to him since or anything. A few weeks ago I Hurd he was going to be a dad now for weeks iv cried and cried to be honest I don’t really know how I feel I mean I would never ever break up anyone I’m not the kind of person to be so cruel and nasty like that in 5 years iv not spoken about the way I feel to anyone and have made a family myself and do not regret anything one bit. My main guilt is I’m engaged to be married to my fiancé while I still think of this other man at the start of our relationship it was a real mess and there was domestic violence involved on his side that’s why I left him and this guy was there for me but I got back with my current partner on the terms he never did it again 8 years on time to time it will still happen my heads a mess I just don’t know what to do.
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