Izzie Cronin took to Facebook to warn others about the signs of an abusive partner.
I WILL NOT NAME HIM THIS IS AN ONGOING CASE THIS POST WAS PURELY TO WARN THOSE WHO ARE WORRIED ABOUT THEIR PARTNERS
I would never normally post something like this however I think it is extremely important to make people aware of the signs of an abusive partner. I would never want anyone to have to go what I have been through I feel it is very important for me to outline the initial signs of an abusive person that can easily be excused. This all happened in the early hours of Thursday morning this week.
My story- My now ex boyfriend (my first ever boyfriend) was always very jealous and possessive of me, every emotion he had for me was heightened, he was either all over me and completely obsessed or he’d snap and say horrible personal things at the slightest thing I did that he considered wrong. We had a very intense relationship and I had mentioned to him before that I felt he would always put me down to make himself feel better however I never saw what happened coming. I thought I had a normal relationship with a normal person with normal up and downs. I was so deeply in love with him I am so devastated and heartbroken that my first love could’ve done this to me.
The night- We went on a night out, we had both been drinking however he was particularly drunk. After only a short period of time he threw a drink at me in the bar we were at as I said he was too drunk to have my drink. He stormed off made a huge scene and the bouncers kicked him out because it was clear he was causing me distress. I revived over 65 missed calls from him while I was still in the bar as he was waiting outside until I left, about 2 hours later. He tried to get in a taxi with me home but of course I didn’t want him to so a friend of mine came back in a taxi with me to make sure I was okay and away from him. He texted me many times apologising saying how much he loved me and how sorry he was. He later turned up at my house and my friend let him in and left as we believed he was truly sorry.
When we were alone he took my phone off me and started scrolling through my messages. He accessed my whatsapp account and read messages form a male from 2016, way before he and I had ever even met him I DID NOT CHEAT ON HIM. In his drunken state he believed these messages were from when we were together and this was when the beating began. I was honestly so shocked and absolutely terrified, I couldn’t believe what was happening, here was a man who I believed loved me so deeply no matter how snappy he was I never in my wildest dreams thought he would attack me. He punched me repeatedly till I fell to the floor after which he began to kick me continuously in the stomach and head. I have never been so terrified in my life I was in so much shock and intense pain. I managed to stand up and tried to leave my bedroom when shoved me down the stairs and again began brutally kicking me in the face, stomach and head. He then threw me down another flight of stairs when again on the floor he kicked and punched me. I was screaming and crying for help, blood splattering everywhere. I was trying to escape but he was grabbing me back not allowing me to leave.
I was screaming explaining that the messages were from before we met but he wouldn’t listen he was screaming out ‘you slag’ ‘you slut’ ‘you cheater’. I cried out ‘if you don’t stop you’re going to kill me’ and he just shouted back ‘I don’t care’. After a long hour( THIS WAS NOT A SHORT MISTAKE IT WAS A SUSTAINED ATTACK) or so inside my house being subject to this constant beating of which he showed absolutely no sign on slowing down, in fact he seemed to get even angrier, I managed to escape out the front door.
He ran after me (dressed only in his boxers), he grabbed and threw me to the pavement and continually kicked me in the head, stomach and face. Bare in mind he had kicked me so many times he had a bruise on his own foot. I was crawling on the pavement unable to walk screaming for help but he was still kicking me flat onto my face it was like once he started he couldn’t stop. Luckily a terrified neighbour called the police from inside her house.I have heard this phone call and she sounds absolutely petrified and you could hear me screaming in the background crying out of help.
I managed to get up and I tired to run away as fast as I could covered in blood and bruises. The police then arrived and arrested him. I had to go to hospital as I couldn’t think properly or remember anything and I was in intense pain. I was luckily enough to have great friends who stayed with me and looked after me after the attack and helped me get through it. I don’t know what I would’ve done had I been alone afterwards. I am so grateful to the girl who called the police without her I honestly believe he would’ve done some very serious damage or that I might not be here.
The aftermath- he was kept in jail till Friday, he pleaded guilty to ABH (as there are no broken bones) and was released on bail. On the night of his release he even posted a picture of him smiling with his friends at 4am showing absolutely no remorse for his actions. While I’m lying at home unable to move, sleep or eat, crying my eyes out for hours.
I really urge anyone who has a controlling, possessive or jealous partner to read this post and seriously think about whether you completely trust your them. You need to work out whether these characteristics could lead to something worse or whether it is worth being with someone who treats you like this. I had only been with this male officially for 3 months and he had never shown any signs or violence towards me. It can just take one drunken thought in their mind for someone capable of abuse to attack you.
PLEASE be so cautious if you feel your partner has any of these characteristics or if they have ever been violent to you before. I would never wish this kind of pain and torment on anyone it had been absolutely unbearable for me and my family. I have been in extreme pain since the attack and the thoughts going through my mind have been killing me.
Nothing in the world can justify this kind of behaviour and I hope that if you feel you are in the beginning or an abusive relationship that this will help you realise that the best thing you can do is leave as soon as possible. Just remember that somebody who is capable of this is not capable of real love, only sick, twisted, manipulation of your emotions. A person who is capable of abuse is a friend of no one and should be treated with serious caution and fear as you never know who their next victim may be.
Thank you for reading and I hope that I may be able to help people by sharing my story. Please share this if you think it could help you or someone you know.