Can I have a private post please am I the one who’s wrong here I have no friends…

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Can I have a private post please am I the one who’s wrong here I have no friends I ran away from a domestic violence relationship and for 3 and a half years since I met my partner it’s been me and him I didn’t trust anyone lost a lot of them as they didn’t bother with me when I moved away and struggled through loosing a child and other problems in life alone not wanting to burden my partner. We split the other month he went on nigh out after nigh out while I was home with the kids he went to car events the cafe football the lot and every weekend goes to his familys sat for half a day and Sunday for half a day and has done since we’ve been together every time I want to go somewhere I alway have the kids in tow even if he’s not doin anything. I’m pregnant 34 weeks theyv told me come my scan Friday if any more complications show ill be admitted and induced this has happened with all 3 children at the same gestation so everyone nos its goin to happen. We’ve had a lot of family dramas and stress and found complications with the baby that’s put us in hospital every single day the past two weeks on top of that our daughter was extremely poorly up day and night for days on end and it got so much i collapsed endinf up in hospital for 3 days. It’s been one thing after another this weekend jus gone despite everything he went to his familys most the day sat and Sunday then went to watch the football at night I was shattered but didn’t say anything I new he was to I even offerd him to go and stay at his mums to get a good night’s sleep. Last week a girl iv started to get to no from school who completly took me out my shel introduced me to people encouraged me to go to mums and tots group invited me for a brew. He started bitchin about how hel have to have our youngest and why isn’t she invited to. I cancelled today my 5 year old has been diagnosed with conjunctivitis because of Friday lurking this girl said afrer the hospital tomorrow nip hers for half hour havd a time out a brew and she’s got a hospital bag with a few bits in for me. I turned round and said to my partner tommorow I’m going to nip round such a bodys for a brew. He started goin on about how is it a good idea (her daughter has a eye infection not a contagious one jus swollen puffy eyes and on drops,) I said yes it’s not contageous and he started goin on how why would I do that riskin our one year old getting something via me bein round her how I’m selfish and I havnt even asked him iv jus assumed he’d watch the kids I said iv not got up and walked out like he does when he wants to go for a hair cut or a brew I said iv told him. It’s turned into a huge row I’m selfish and ridiculous and even phoned his mum sayin how stupid was it because this girl is poorly and i have a poorly kid at home. I said it’s not contageous and said he doesn’t ask my permission every time he goes his familys he said no and he never will. Iv jus said iv been so stressed and busy and could end up in hospital for weeks on Friday and jus wanted half hour to unwind take time out and I got well I don’t have a life i havnt had a life since iv met u I said i feel like he’s bein like my ex and controlling he said he wouldn’t care if i went and slept with another man he really wouldn’t I’m jus bein selfish putting my kids at risk and if they caught anything I’d have to come out of hospital if I got admitted because he wouldnt do it because it would be my fault is this me?
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