Can I have a private post please?.. I’ve currently found out I’m pregnant, I’m …
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Can I have a private post please?..
I’ve currently found out I’m pregnant, I’m about 4 weeks.. This would be my third baby, but my partners first, I have two children from my last relationship, one almost 4 and one just turned 1.. me and my partner have been together 8 months, and the way he’s reacted to this pregnancy has left me feeling so shit.. He is pretty much making the decision to terminate the pregnancy but in my heart I just want the chance to be a family.. he was all fine and well until he told him mum (him being a mummy’s boy) she decided it’s just not the best time.. So I’ve gone along with it and tried to forget what’s happening, on Monday we had a massive row just because I mentioned keeping the baby and giving ourselfs the chance to be a family.. am I being out of order? Any how he ended the relationship, the next morning decided we weren’t split up but he needed time to think about things (baring in mind he was the one to completely over react to the conversation) and the he’s told me the only way I can earn his trust back is to terminate the pregnancy? I see that as being unfair but I feel like I have to do it to keep him and his mummy happy..! It’s breaking my heart because I’m so attached to something already and I just want things to be ok.. But in reality it’s really not? Without sounding selfish I wouldn’t want to be alone with 3 children.. I want the family life I want the chance to share a pregnancy and enjoy it because my son and daughters dad was absolutely awful whilst I was pregnant with our daughter.. I can’t go through that again… But is it bad that I’m just thinking on the other side than he is? Am I supposed to do as I’m told and we’ll all live happily ever after??! So stressed out it’s made me feel drained!!! So sorry for the long post but I feel better letting it all out x
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I think you need to have a think about what’s more important to u.. if u would rather have the baby alone or don’t and be with him. He doesn’t sound like he’s mature enough to be a dad as he has clearly
Made his mind up, and in my opinion I wouldn’t want to be with someone who is trying to make U choose!!
But ultimately it’s your choice and your choice alone.. do u want to spend the rest of your life with someone’s like him who can be so cruel by trying to manipulate you into choosing ?
Honey 17 weeks ago I was exactly where you are now, I decided to keep my baby! He split up with me & left me homeless but I at least have all the love of my child to look forward to, men come & go in our lives but our children will love us forever, don’t let anyone bully you into having an abortion because it’s something you may come to regret later on.
My ex almost convinced me to do it, I had a consultation & even had the procedure booked but 5 days before the date I cancelled it as I just couldn’t go through with it, I cried every single day and it was the worst time ever me but my family is by my side & supporting me, the dad is long gone but I know it’ll be ok, I’m 21+4 can’t wait to meet my son now
Feel free to message me any time you like sweet xx
Please think this through first before making any decisions. Also, you need to remember that having a termination is by no means a guarantee that he will stay with you for ever. How would you feel if you terminated the pregnancy now then he still walks out on you in a week or a month’s time?
Jeeeeez some people, if he didn’t want a baby why didn’t he use something as well as you, that way it is double the chance of not getting pregnant. He can not pin it all on you. He had the ‘pleasure ‘ of your sessions as well. Some people need to think before speaking- he will regret what he has said to you soon and then the damage is done.
You both have a choice, if he wants to go met him and if you want to keep the baby do it and go it alone. If not go for the 2nd option ( not going to say it but you know that option)
I can’t believe that he had said that to earn his trust back you need to terminate, I don’t see what trust you have broken? Other than him believing you will terminate just on his say so. Hun you need to do what is right for you, not for him, not for anyone else. If I’m honest he doesn’t sound very mature, if you decide to keep you’re baby and he doesn’t step up then that’s his loss not yours. You will have another little blessing who will love you forever. I know the idea of being single with three kids may be a little upsetting but if he doesn’t step up and be a family then one day you will meet someone who will. I wish you all the best, don’t let him or his mother bully you into something you may regret. xxx
Omg. What a right ass wipe. Excuse my language. How dare he say you have to terminate to earn his trust…. Well if u didnt want a baby twat put something one the end of it. Im a full time mummy of 4 children and wouldn’t change this for the world. I have 1 year 13 days between my oldest 2 children and 16 months between my youngest 2. Follow your 💙. Dont sound like he will be about long x
Sounds like a right tosser! You’ve only known him 8 month, me personally I’d say good riddance good bye I’ll let ya know when baby is here your choice to be a dad or not.
U have to do what is right for u but don’t just do it to make him and his mum happy, u will end up hating him and her if u do it just to please them. No matter what u choose to do make sure it’s the RIGHT one for u and ur two current babies xxxxx
He sounds really childish! Saying the only way to earn his trust back is to terminate! As if you have betrayed him or sneakily got pregnant on your own or something! What a little boy! There’s no way I would abort the baby for a relationship that might not even last anyway, mummy’s boys and immature men get very boring very quickly once the honeymoon period of a relationship is over! X
My babies father was exactly like this. I’m now a single mom to a beautiful one year old baby and he has completely kicked off and left and doesn’t really have anything to do with my child but I now have someone that cares about the both of us and I couldn’t be happier. I know if I terminated my pregnancy I wouldn’t have been happy and no man can fill that void that it would have created. Personally if a man reacts like that about a pregnancy and gives you a choice that in my eyes is no man. He will regret that decision.
Personally .. I would tell him either to accept it or leave and don’t come back. As hard as it may be don’t let him think he’s winning, he should get his head around it giving time, sounds like the moms the problem not him of he was ok until she found out
Catch 22. Terminate and hate him for the rest of your time together (which most likely won’t last as you’ll always blame him for making you choose)
Or be alone and having an extra weight on your shoulders. But… having someone who loves you unconditionally and would never make you choose anything! X
Myself would of swiped the bugga out of the door as soon as he acted like a child! Yes he could be upset and not what he wanted but then there’s contraception that prevent moments like this! Also if he’s not willing to stick around and step up for his own what makes you think he’ll stick around for your other two in the future! You’ve got to put yourself first is this situation and do what you want life is to short to make others happy! ☺️ xx
Don’t let anyone force you to terminate you’re pregnancy, to be honest if this is how he’s reacting would you even want to continue this relationship he should support you . If you want to keep the baby then do so but be willing to do it alone without him. Remember it’s you’re choice and make the choice for you not him or how it will effect you’re relationship. You deserve better than that. And being family doesn’t necessarily mean you need a man for that you will have you’re children. You’re never going to be a family ever with him if this is how he’s reacting . And you will never get a happy ending with a man like that.
I think you need to sit and think what is more important to you. Honestly because your boyfriend should not be your priority right now. You both lay down and made the baby so tell him to step up and support you like he should be. I would never ever terminate a pregnancy for anyone. I would rather be on my own than with some one who thinks it’s ok to make you choose between your unborn baby and him. I would pack his stuff and show him the door. He clearly has more feeling for what his mom thinks. We are talking about a baby not a new toy. Tel him to do one!
Doesn’t sound like he is worth keeping. Sounds like there are 3 people in your relationship. The Mummy’s boy needs to grow up. If you get rid of the baby for him you will always regret it and will most likely end up resenting him anyway.
He cant no make that decision for you no one can your body you are carrying that baby inside of you not him if its breaking your heart now imagen what you will be like after you go through with his demands its a massive decision and you can’t let others make it for you, i hope the decision you make is the right one for YOU and you are happy with whatever you decide xxx
You would really terminate a pregnancy to keep a man. It’s seems like your letting him and his mother call the shots. No one wants to be a single mother but it shows he’s not man enough to face up to his responsibilities. You love this baby so have it you are not in any way being unreasonable he is for saying he’ll continue a relationship if you have an abortion. You need to grow a back bone and take back control. Say u do terminate the pregnancy and he leaves you. No man should come before your children.
Emotional blackmail at its finest, the only way to earn back his trust is to terminate, I’d open the door for him and ram him back up his mothers hole
You can’t make someone have a baby if they don’t want one, you need to decide what you want to do, don’t do anything to make someone else happy, if you want to keep the baby then have it and raise it alone, don’t do something you’ll regret
To say if you terminate then you can be together is out of order and I believe it shows him for what he is. And if you do terminate, who is to say he won’t leave anyway? Good luck x
If you terminate this baby, the baby that you are already in love with, because of your partner and his mum then you will grow to resent and hate them both.
Do what you feel in your heart is right, if you want to keep this baby then keep it. If he’s not man enough to stay and be a Dad then he doesn’t deserve to be one xxx
OK,it’s not his decision to terminate. He can have his opinion,but since you’re the one who has to go through it,that makes it ultimately your decision. It sounds like he hasn’t cut the apron strings and his mum has got inside his head and is pulling strings. If abortion is the right decision for *you*,then go ahead but if it’s not,then you have to accept that you may well be a single mum. It might not be what you want,but maybe it’s the Universe’s way of telling you better things are coming and you need to get rid of the deadwood. Be honest with him and yourself,because I suspect that you already resent him for demanding you abort. Imagine how you’d feel if you went through with it because it’s what HE wanted. Take some time and make the right decision for YOU
Im Sorry but WhY do u have to earn his trust again?? It’s your baby your body. No man should tell u to kill your baby. What happens if u fall pregnant few months later a year later will that be the right time? No man is worth your baby .
Good luck with what you decide. Ps you have brought two kids up alone I’m sure u can do it again. Xxxxxx
If I were in your situation I couldn’t look at him the same again, I would have to walk away. He wants to terminate his own baby. He needs to cut the apron strings, bet she’s nipping in his ear & he’s doing what his mum wants him to do. That’s her grandchild 😪 do what’s best for you & the kids you already have. Don’t let anyone put pressure on you. You sound like you want this baby, don’t let him change your mind because without a doubt you will regret it. Good luck. Xx