Can I have ppp? I’ve got 4 and half month old baby and I’m pregnant again but…

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Can I have ppp?

I’ve got 4 and half month old baby and I’m pregnant again but early days (wasnt expected but that not the problem)

Me and baby’s father ain’t together as we both have our issues to work on and it’s hard as we was fighting a lot due to leaving with my parents and them getting involved.

My last pregnancy wasn’t easy and I’m absolutely scared if I become that poorly again. My daughter is very healthy and happy. My world and has everything she’s needs and never want for anything as me and my ex wouldn’t allow it.

The doctors think I had postnatal depression but mild so they didn’t pick up on it until this pregnancy and now the midwife and head doctor who does consultant, also my doctor have referred me to a lady who’s a ex midwife to test me and see what’s wrong to put me on tablets and help me as I’ve got that low I didn’t want to be here and I’m finding it’s hard to care for my daughter.

I’ve tried talking to my family and friends asking for help. They scream at me and make me feel worse.. say” I shouldn’t be a mother” “keep it up and they going to take my daughter away” “I’m being selfish” there fuck all wrong” so on. To the point I’ve packed me and my daughter up and moved in with my ex so he can support me and our daughter but mainly care for my little girl so I can help myself and get better. I went home today on my own for a few reasons.. 1 to tell my family what’s going on regarding me and 2 to grab so more stuff for my daughter. I went in and my dad started on me saying “your back with him, he’s gunner drop you again when he’s bored 😐 of playing father” I said “no we’re not and he’s on the sofa and I’m in the bed on my own” my dad went on to say” yeah you drop your family because your that desperate to be with me” as I said “no it’s not like that.. I’m having a hard time and can’t keep putting on you and mum” he walked off and told me ” hurry up and get the fuck out of his house”

My hole family treat me like I’m shit on there shoe and all about money. If I get money there my best friend and want to know me. When I was home me .. I got called every name under the sun and put down by my own mother.

I tried to go out a lot and because of my passed I panic a lot and think of the worst so i asked if someone to go with me. And they go but at a cost. I have to buy them lunch.

I live off £74 a week, my bills get paid monthly e.g rent, phone, car and so on. I pay for my food shopping every couple of days but my parents ate my food and never replaced it so I’m find it hard.

I’m stuck I miss my home and want my own bed but I’m so scared to go home and don’t know what todo. Because I’ve tried talking to my family and saying things have to change.. 😔 but they don’t care.

Am I right give everyone space and letting things calm down because I try again or do I wait until the contact me 😔
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