Could I have a private post on behalf of my partner plz. My 10 yo ds spends 4 n…

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Could I have a private post on behalf of my partner plz.

My 10 yo ds spends 4 nights a week with me and my partner (and her 2 kids; 15 and 11 yo). But with Christmas, spent 2 weeks with his mum. Since coming back on Christmas Day he has soiled himself every night whilst sitting down whilst either watching tv, playing on the PlayStation or even eating his dinner. He says that he is unaware of it happening and the first warning we get is ‘that smell’. We’ve been encouraging him to sit on the toilet, eat fresh fruit and have regular drinks (he’s not constipated at all). He has sporadic episodes of wetting himself (usually whilst in bed), but this was resolving until this week. It turns out that when he’s with his mum she puts him in pyjama pants and that he will sit there and wee and poo whilst watching tv or playing on his iPad. I’ve spoken to his mum who has confirmed this and is now trying to put the blame on us and she is now threatening to block me from contacting her at all. Both my partner and myself have sat him down and chatted about this to him and we’ve agreed to get him to go to the toilet after dinner and before he plays to try and empty his bowel and bladder. However we have said as a consequence he will loose out on the PlayStation and iPad. (Our thinking if this is a possible cause then it might encourage him to want to try and a reward of having his friend over for a sleepover if he is dry and clean for a period of time.) I’d value any advice on this. Thanks in advance
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