Hi ppp – ok so this is a difficult one, I have an older sister who is very menta…

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Hi ppp – ok so this is a difficult one, I have an older sister who is very mentally unwell. She has a personality disorder, and is very narsasistic (sorry for spelling) she also has chronic depression and also other currently undiagnosed mental disorders. She has been sectioned and therefore has a huge amount of intervention from the crisis team, psychologists and also is on very strong anti depression and psychosis drugs. I’m after advice because she is delusional, and destructive. Non of our family have any history of mental health to this extreme and whilst other family members think they know best the truth is that non of us have any mental health training and therefore do not know how to handle her. She lies, she fantasises and is very controlling (mainly because we are all so frightened of her vicious tongue and aggressiveness) I have been attacked on multiple occasions all through childhood and through my teenage years, she has sliced me with a knife, bitten me and kicked my head so hard that I suffered from concussion and missed some of my exams as a child. There has never been any police intervention as my parents want to protect her and up until very lately decided not to contact a GP or the police despite her trying to commit Suicide and serious self harm issues. It was only when a friend of hers sought help did she start going on to medication. She has been unwell since being a child and is now in her 40’s. I know people will want to comment on my parents behaviour, and trust me my parents behaviour and trust me their actions have definitely contributed to her mental state but that’s not what I’m here for. I’m wondering if anyone can point me in the direction of any support for me? I’m currently the only person who has regular contact with her and the only one who listens to her. That’s because she has destroyed the other relationships to a point of no return (she really is brutal). I’m getting married soon. She is so dominant and she is already controlling every inch of my wedding and I’m too scared to say no. I need to know what the right way of dealing with her is. At the moment I’m letting her speak about her delusions and letting her vent to me about family arguments (by not saying anything she thinks I’m in agreement) but I know that I am not doing the right think here because I am actually making her feel that she is behaving normally when she isn’t. She has tried committing suicide numerous of times and is a very intellectual women. She is fooling her mental health team. She is not well, and I’m the only one who knows the true depths. It’s ruining my life, I’m in constant fear of her and it’s ruining my relationship. I just can’t let her kill herself though! Which is the constant threat I feel if I do anything wrong. And it’s not an empty threat either, because she has done this to me before. So for anybody in a similar situation, how do u cope? Who helps you? What’s the right thing to do? My life would be easier without having contact, but obviously I can’t let her self destruct again. How do I protect me and my family? Any advice would be appreciated, I need help. Tia xxx
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