Please can I have a post? I’ve been with my partner for 4 years and we have a …

[ad_1]
Please can I have a post?

I’ve been with my partner for 4 years and we have a two year old. Since I’ve known him whenever he has been on a night out he’s always got ridiculously drunk to the point of being totally irresponsible, he’ll loose his phone, spend 100+, sometimes he even gets arrested because he’s being a drunk nuisance and he’ll have to wait in a cell till the next day.

He can’t just go out for a drink and come home and a reasonable time, even after his friends have gone home he’ll stay out drinking by himself just getting worse and worse. Several times I have had to go to find him passed out in town somewhere. If I didn’t have a two year old with him I wouldn’t argue about it and I’d leave him be, but as we have a child it pisses me off to no end that he can not be responsible for a night out and so every time this happens we have a big argument. He will call me jealous etc cos I don’t go out often and all of his friends think I’m the possessive type but the truth is every time this happens it affects me, either having to produce a new phone for him or we are £100 down and I have to make up for it when it comes to shopping etc, not to mention the anxiety of will something bad happen to him whilst he is ultimately in such a vulnerable state. It also makes me really angry that he feels he is able to abandon his 2 year old for sometimes 24 hours whilst he goes on a bender because he knows I’ll be sat at home looking after her.

The problem I’m having now is that tonight my friend has said she will take me out for a couple of drinks for my birthday. I haven’t actually been out for a drink with friends since my last birthday and I really want to go. I know for a fact my partner is going to try and make this hell for me because of how I behave when he says he’s going out for a drink, I don’t want to argue with him, I’ve been out drinking probably 3 times without him since I’ve met him and have always been home for whatever time I said I would be, with all my possessions and I’ve never spent over what we can afford.

How can I approach him about this or try and explain to him why me going out drinking and him going out drinking are two different things? Can I add it is only recently I’ve starting being awkward with him whenever he suggests going out and it’s because I know now exactly what will happen whereas in the past I would try to give him the benefit of the doubt.

I know it sounds like he’s being an arse (cause he is) but I don’t want to go in all guns blazing cause I want to go out in a good mood, whenever I try to explain to him he has an answer to everything and I get that frustrated I can’t get my words out right and I end up looking stupid.

Sorry it’s a long one, thank you xx
[ad_2]

Source