So my boyfriend & I are 19 and still live at my mums (trying to get our own plac…
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So my boyfriend & I are 19 and still live at my mums (trying to get our own place) we always have silly arguments then makeup, but if he’s lost at FIFA or something he takes it out on me but when I point that out he denies is. About 20 min ago I brought up our dinner and some cheese cake on the side as he loves cheese cake. we finished food and he was gaming so I reached over for cheesecake to eat it and he elbowed me by mistake whilst trying to itch his arm and instantly I hit his arm but it was literally A TAP!! I always do it and he never reacts like he did today. He pushed me off the bed and threw the cheese cake all over my walls then rubbed it on my face. The cheesecake got allover my bed, hair, walls, new washing basked full of clean clothes my mum just washed. Then a bit flew onto his work trousers and he started blaming me them went over and ripped out my £200 jo malone candle and started laughing after I got all upset and tears cleaning up all the cheesecake out the carpet etc. I’m honestly so upset, not over the candle but over the fact that he’s being so horrible when it’s not even his house it’s my parents, my mum has washed all his clothes and he just throws cheesecake everywhere! He’s away to the gym now and I’m about to shower all this cheesecake off myself. Please any advice 😰
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Please reply to my post: thanks everyone😓. It’s just hard to argue back or throw him out etc as my family are downstairs I don’t want them seeing this and worrying😰
Please reply to nicci: I’ve been with him since I was 11 honest to god I’m so in love with him. I can’t just get rid of him I really love him 😞 x
I would have shoved his face into the cheesecake on all the things and tell him he got a free face paint how fucking disrespectful but as you replied you ” can’t get rid of him ” then your gonna lean the hardway he sounds like a childish fucktard 👌 you can do better you just have to open your eyes properly
I’d through the cheesecake in all his boxers too & forget about giving him dinner till he learns respect 😋 I swear I’m a lovely person 😋😋
If you ‘can’t get rid of him’ then don’t be upset when he treats you like this this – by tolerating this you are allowing him to think it’s acceptable to treat you or your parents like this, and it is absolutely NOT! Tbh Hun I find this incredibly concerning, and these are massive warning signs. He wanted to humiliate you by doing this, rubbing cheesecake in your actual face while your down on the floor – it’s abuse your fearing how he is going react over silly things? Get rid and leave him now, if this is how he acts in your parents house can you imagine when you are both living alone with no one else there? You more than likely do love him, but when your 19 you always believe you have met the one forever and you couldent live without them, but the truth is you can. It’s a couple of weeks of heartache and tears but you will get over him, and be grateful in the long run to have gotten out of that situation. In the end you will make your own choices, but just remember you deserve better and your stronger than you ever know. Xx There’s a difference between joking and messing about play fighting/being silly and this is not that, please don’t convince your self this is.
In 3 years when the anger gets more intense and ur a little older u will ask urself “why did I stay with that arse hole so long” even though right now….u can’t see urself living without “prince charming” been there done that
If he really loved you he wouldn’t do that to you hun. Honestly get rid your still young. You have your whole life ahead of you. He’s acting like a child seeing how far he can push you and how much you’ll take. So show him the door and allow yourself to heal and move on! Xx
As a survivor of domestic abuse….it took me 7 years to finally say “bye bye” no matter how many black eyes, my friends and family couldn’t convince me, my kids weren’t enough to make me leave….NOTHING AND NOBODY could convince me he was going to eventually kill me. One day I woke up and thought “nope not today…not tomorrow…not ever again” and I left and never went back. I thought I couldn’t live without him. I thought he would change. I thought it was normal…..it got worse and worse and worse. I wish I took everyone’s advice back then….but for whatever reason I didn’t. Now I look back and say why the he’ll did I put up with it for so long? You live and u learn…get rid of him now!
If my partner did anything like that while we where at my mums (we stayed for a while) she would have kicked his arse all over our home town! And then id have kicked his arse! Childish fuck! Kick him out! And keep his FIFA! 😂✋ x
Forget that if that’s how he’s treating you now it will only get worse that’s so disrespectful! My mum wouldn’t of aloud him back in her house if my bf ever did that
Kick him the hell out and find yourself a decent man not a pathetic stroppy child. You say you really love him but are you still going to love him when it turns to not just throwing cheesecake, maybe throwing you against a wall or knocking seven shades of crap out of you? Because the warning signs are there. I know I’ve lived through it. If that’s how you want to live then carry on because it won’t get better. If he’s capable of doing this with your family downstairs what the hell is he capable of when they’re not. Just think about it. Read your post back and seriously think about it x
This is abuse ….If he is comfortable enough to abuse you in your parents home he will most definitely abuse you if not worse when you live on your own…. I would talk with your parents and get him out …He needs help and therapy or counseling. ..you do also as you seem to think you love him and want to fix this ….you can’t fix this and this is not love …He is dangerous and needs to go somewhere else asap
U really love him but he smothered cheesecake in your face in a temper. Threw it all around the room of the house he doesn’t own and then destroyed your candle and laughed in your face? After you’ve made the effort to (possibly cook his food I dunno if you or your family did) deliver his food to him, bring him a desert because your trying to be nice as it’s his favourite and then he does that to you and your fine with it? Also you mentioned it’s not the first time he has got annoyed at you for losing at fifa!
Being in a relationship myself from 16 to 21 that was in my eyes then ‘great’ … even though he had me in tears most weekends always ditching me when he had promised magical date nights out somewhere….. really think u can do better. I’m now near 30 with a very hard working other half 2 children and only ever the odd argument that normal couples have. I’m glad I told the ex all those years ago that I no longer needed him in.my life even though I still loved him. He had done that much wrong and i did wrong to retaliate against him hurting me emotionally that I realised yes I loved him but I don’t need him
I def don’t think u need this guy. I think he needs u for what he wants, living space somewhere to place his game and then time with u (when he decides)
You love him, but does he love you? And honestly, don’t say yes. Sounds harsh but if he can do that to you then no, he doesn’t love you at all. He may think he does but real love wouldn’t allow someone to do that to another person. It sounds so mean to say it but what he has is “comfortable” with you. He is used to being with you as you are him after being together for so long. But there is a huge difference between comfortable love and real love. I’m sorry if this sounds upsetting but take it from someone who knows! You need to leave him and it will hurt and you will feel like life won’t continue but it will, and when it does continue your life will be so much happier and brighter and the right man will come along and you will realise all those little amazing things that were missing from your relationship.
You can do so much better, You deserve much better….believe it!!! If you have children together they would see this behaviour and think it normal, I’m sure you wouldn’t want your future son to treat women like that or your future daughter to be treated that way.
Remember you don’t need him and you are important xxx
WTF, 19 years old and behaving like that?? That’s awful and the laughing at you whilst your crying and cleaning up HIS tantrum is actually him knowing you would do and take anything for him and from him and he’s would still be your number1, shock the nobhead and stick a bag of clothes on the doorstep. It’s abuse hun xx it will just get worse, but your mother would have him out her house knowing he is like this towards you? Your worth so much more x☹
I’d be throwing the PlayStation out the window! Sounds like he need to grow up. My mother would never have allowed a boyfriend of mine to have treated that way under her roof. You’re still young, get rid and find yourself a nice young man 🙂 Staying with him will only destroy you on the inside, don’t let that happen x
He sound like he takes steriods. Losing the plot like that. Dump him before it gets worse. If you move out of home you wont have the restraints and protection he feels in your parents house, as you said thats not much anyway. He likes to make you cry he enjoys the power he has, he’s dangerous.
I would be bagging his clothes up, chucking them out side & locking the door. Then when he gets hold of u I would be telling him to jog on!! Sounds like a horrible sweaty gamer that’s obviously not grown up!! You could do better then that. You don’t do that to a woman let alone in some one else’s house, very disrespectful!! I would get rid!!!! Or atleast give him a shock!! Don’t let any man walk all over you!!! X
Sometimes men get so comfortable in a situation thats when you see the real side of him. Y’all have been together longer than most married couples. But you are also becoming adults. He is changing as will you. People don’t always turn out who we want them to be. There are so many other people out in the world. I would not settle for him just because you have been together for so long and you just can’t imagine being with anyone else. Trust me there’s someone out there who will treat you right. An this is coming from someone who was with a man from age 13 till 20 who just left the day I found out I was pregnant cause he wasn’t ready an he treated me the same way after a while. Your happiness is worth more than him.
If a guest staying in my house treated my daughter this way he wouldn’t have arms and legs to get to the gym let alone rub cheesecake in her face, he’s a total scumbag in my eyes and I would get rid now before it gets any worse xx
If it was me I would take a sledge hammer to his gaming device 😂 then put all of his stuff in a bin bag at the front door and tell him he wasn’t welcome back. Nobody deserves to be treated like that. Xx
Kick him out. This is a sever over reaction and will get worse. How did no one else in the house hear this Stop being scared of him you are 19 and have your whole life ahead of you. You don’t deserve that and he certainly doesn’t deserve you
I don’t even need to say it, these ladies have said it for me.
Black bags – fill them – change the locks & say ByeBye! U do not treat a woman like that or be so damn disrespectful to her or her family.
If he can be like that at your mums, I dread to think what he’d be like if you both lived alone. It’s a frightening indicator of his true nature. You have to tell your mum the full truth and get her opinion. I suspect, like me she would advise you to split up with him. Now is the time, while you have the support of your family. If it gets worse when you have your own place it will be harder to dump him and possibly more dangerous.
Don’t want an argument, then don’t disturb his FIFA 😂 I’m just kidding. I would only do what you feel is necessary. Don’t just kick him out if you’re that much in love with him. Pull him aside, have a weird but nice conversation with him. And distract him from FIFA. That’s the only issue you seem to have. Video games. Take him away from it all slowly and make him realise he has a gem to look after and care for instead of wasting his time on video games