Every Parents Morning Struggle 

Ahh mornings. 🎉

To be honest I’ve always been an early to rise sort of person so getting up early isn’t a problem. 

However, how I used to wake up is much much different to the current way I’m ripped from the depths of slumber and dragged into the morning light, barely clothed and afraid. 

See, time was I used to wake like most folk; quietly, smoothly transitioning from sleep to woken, gradually adjust to the natural light from the windows and then the harsh interior home lighting. 

Good times. 

Waking with a child…😬🎉🎉🔥💀

I scarcely stir mere moments before a small version of myself crashes into the room, head first, as if she’s taking point on the biggest crime bust of the century and she’s not going to let the other guys take the credit; the only difference is she’s yelling ‘daddy’ instead of ‘police!’.

Already starting to trip balls as my system shifts the wake up routine into overdrive, Dave in the adrenaline department opens the valve all the way open. 

From here, I can barely just start to make out the small shape making all the noise when BLAM! the overhead big lights flash on and my retinas scream as they 100% fail to cope with the binary change from zero light to ALL THE LIGHT! 💀

Just as the pain subsides and I wonder if the small one has accompanied her door kicking with a military-grade flashbang, I then discover what it’s like to be a trampoline, as it proceeds to further proclaim the arrival of morning with a spot of jumping on and around my prone form…

#InsiderTip set your alarm 10 mins before you know the small interrogator is due to arrive prepare you body for the coming assault. 

Happy Morning everyone 👌🏻

Credit@ Diaries of a disgruntled dad