Can I have a private post please I think Iv jus ruined my Christmas me and my p…
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Can I have a private post please I think Iv jus ruined my Christmas 😞 me and my partner struggled since our son passed away in labour he didn’t deal and left straight after (well few weeks) we tried again and I fel pregnant he again left it was to much (I understood this but I was hurt as I have no friends or family so was completely left alone for day on end at a time through such a difficult time.) because of this I developed serious ptsd and post natal depression I broke down in my local children’s center and got asked if my kids were safe with me 😞 he couldn’t deal with supporting me fully and left again because he was struggling himself I spent the first 4 months of her life by myself. I got help and got myself better and pulled through alone we fixed it I no loosing our baby was the cause of the majority. And we were perfect until I fell pregnant after a condom broke he didn’t want It it was to much stress he asked for a abortion left me to go to hospital by myself he said he’d jus got himself in a good place and it was to much he didn’t feel for the baby and I trapped him I spent the majority alone until he came round to the idea (when I was 31 weeks and had a bad trip to the hospital and a scare) he stepped up and I can’t honestly say he’s been a good dad supportive about the baby and hospital comin daily for monitoring fof the past two weeks. But he has moaned about how much has been put on him regarding our daughter and having to do most the heavy lifting as I’m not allowed. I havd two children from a previous dv relationship it was awful I was nocked unconscious pregnant and fell down the stairs had social involved went the births alone, and couldn’t take my youngest home for a month while social decided if I could keep them safe and I had to run off to a women’s refuge to keep them. My pregnancys have been horrible due to all this. I struggle thinking of them bein happy because of all the drama surrounding them. It was jus all worth it in the end of everyone I have 3 perfect little girls. We’ve jus been in bed and he made a comment about how he’s been a arse. He came out with and you regret having children with me don’t u. I was stumped and said.. I don’t regret any of my babys I love them all more than life. He’s jus flipped calling me a nasty horrible cunt. Because I basically (apparently) I regrer them with him. I didn’t I jus couldn’t bring myself to act like it’s been OK and iv been happy I’m hurting deep down that this is my last child and Iv spent the majority upset and alone. He’s jus gone on one sayin how he’s done now he’s walking when this babys here, (27″th dec) I’m horrible I treat him like shit iv jus blown everything how don’t come crying to him when I’m struggling because he won’t be around for me now after what iv said and iv jus ruined Christmas. I’m now in the bath wondering if I should have said different I don’t regret my babys with him or my other kids dad because they wouldn’t be the amazing kids they are now but the pregnancys I do regret because of how hard they were am I a bad person?
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