Can I have a private post please? So sorry if this is long winded! So basica…

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Can I have a private post please?

So sorry if this is long winded!

So basically Iv been with my partner for 7 1/2 years, 3 children. He has a 10 year old boy from previous relationship. When I met my partner I was 18 he was 25, he totally told me 100% him and his ex was over.
Since Iv been with him she is always there, there has been so many incidents in our relationship that has happened including (here goes!)
Him texting her he wanted to see her naked in bed (he claims it was banter 🙄)
She stayed the night after suffering with DV from her then partner with my partner whilst he was housesitting his nans house, claimed nothing happened but she stayed on the sofa
Messages and lies back and thorth! She’s a very pretty girl so I think Iv always been abit on edge.
So her best friend died this week (murdered 😰☹️) and I completely understand my partner wanting to see if his ex was ok ect.

I just can’t seem to shift this feeling out of my head nearly 8 years I have felt like this. I got put on anti depressants, I always feel like she’s there.. they where never truly over! He’s pointed out in our relationship that oh “so and so got a new bed” how would he know she had a new bed? Then I always get shut down (I went to the toilet) it’s an aurgument everyday in our house because of her, I would have so much more respect for him if he told me strait out. I love this man to death, have always stood buy him, he’s a good dad!! I don’t know what to do anymore, I hate him talking to her (she hates my guts and would do anything to hurt me) we have even had a punch up (classy 🤭) i feel like more than ever this feeling is just taking over me!!! 😰
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