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Could I get a ppp , find Christmas very hard really do it for the kids had an ex…

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Could I get a ppp , find Christmas very hard really do it for the kids had an extremely hard year lost my 17 yr old , I’ve no family support my husband family are good but I’ve brothers anniversary to go through the on the 28th feeling miserable, need a plan for the new year, blues are settling in hard , I have no contact with family as my bother was murdered by family memories of a childhood of abuse haunts me daily , ( abuse that is unthinkable)I want to be happy n content with my own family which I adore , how f
Do I get back on a good road ?
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