Could I have a PPP? Thank you I have a 14 week old lb, he wasn’t born into a “…

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Could I have a PPP? Thank you

I have a 14 week old lb, he wasn’t born into a “normal” set up. Dad didn’t want to know, he hadn’t event told his parents. I sent a letter when my baby was 4 weeks old to his parents and then the baby’s dad wanted to know and his parents have been great. I was EBF until this all happened and i started expressing into a bottle for “bonding purposes” slowly I let things slip and he ended up with a few bottles of formula a day. His parents have had my lb for two nights in two weeks, they said it was “to give me a break” I allowed it for “bonding purposes” but its not giving me a break, the nights after both nights he stayed out followed in a struggle to latch on to me, a lot of really testing hours of crying. The nights he was gone were awful, I’m too reliant on having him with me, I felt like my heart had been taken away. Anyway, after the awful night, we’re finally back to just boob which ( I don’t mind about other people’s debate or preference) is my preference, this was the plan before his dad came back, I suffer with depression and breastfeeding helps somewhat with a happier more peaceful bond… I’ve told his dad that I under stand him sleeping out helps them bond but for my reasons that I feel are pretty valid, I don’t want him having another bottle (expressed or formula) until he’s 5/6 months meaning I don’t want him sleeping out.. He’s just said “night.” I feel like such an awful person and I don’t want to fall out with anybody, I know my boy is there boy but do I really have to suffer and sacrifice, surely there are other ways? I’m so upset 😭
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