Could I have a private post please? NBR. Hey guys just wanted some unbiased advi…

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Could I have a private post please? NBR. Hey guys just wanted some unbiased advice if you don’t mind but please no bashing, there is no book out there about this and I’m only human. Anyway, I found my biological father earlier this year after years of searching, never met him and no contact from him whatsoever before then so fast forward and here we are today. (Don’t wanna go into too much detail coz I’d be here all night). I found him through Facebook and we spoke and he was understandably nervous but happy about it all the same. I told him he was a grandad to 2 girls and he seemed chuffed. We met and it was love at first sight (for me anyway and not in an incest kinda way lol). I was like wow that’s my dad, my daddy, s*** I found him at last! We were both nervous but happy and he gave me his story and it wasn’t all fairytale it was straight to the point, I was an a** I wanted women, booze, drugs and rock and roll and I wasn’t interested… and on the story went again not giving details it’s very personal. So anyway I find I have more family and I’m so pleased I can’t tell ya. Fast forward again and we’ve met a total of 3 times this year, brought his wife with him the last time and she seemed really nice. We text or phone each other and keep in contact blah blah lol. So the problem being and for gawd sake I’ve already had a word with myself and spoke to a friend in a similar situation about it so please don’t bash but be honest, there doesn’t seem to be much effort on his part and I see what he and his family do on Facebook and I feel left out. I know we still need to get to know each other and meet the other family and I’m the stranger and what not but he says he’ll do this or come then and whatnot but then doesn’t and then his wife is all over Facebook that they’re doing this and doing that and I’m sat on the side doing nothing but watch and feel crap. I also have a stepsister and for a long time until closer to when she was due it was hidden from me that she was expecting and when I was finally told I’ll be honest I was in 2 minds, happy for her and chuffed my family is getting bigger and feeling neutral coz I don’t even know them. Since then it’s been babies this and babies that from stepmum and by all means their her first grandkids of course she’s gonna be chuffed but she’s not included me and my kids and I know she doesn’t know us or met my kids but christ love remember you married a man with baggage so maybe a little sensitivity to the stranger on the outside and then I think oh just be quiet and get a grip of yourself she don’t know you so what you whingeing for give it time! I have a lot of words with myself lol. I’m really undecided here peeps, on the one hand there’s more family to meet and it takes time so stop panicking and getting your knickers in a twist and take it day by day, expect nothing and on the other I’m kinda oh why did I bother I’ll never be part of it all I’m the stranger and encroaching on their lives that they’ve already been living without a second thought to me and mine and then I tell myself will you just shut up for gawd sake haha. In a pickle here guys, what would you do? Please help! I’m really starting to think I should never have bothered because one parent has hurt me and now I might be setting myself up for another to do it or tear myself apart over thinking it all. I sound crazy I know but just tryna be honest. Sorry for the essay.
TIA xxx
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