Could I have a private post please
Just looking for some advice I’ll try keep it short but is a long one!!
I have to kids to my ex we ended on bad terms because of physical and mental abuse we set up arrangements where he would have them weekends there was always excuses as to why he couldn’t have them even over petty things like me wanting to my son to see my brother for an hour on his first birthday (drama between the due to the relationship) that was only until 12 he had them from them he refused to have them the following weekend! After about a year and a half of him picking and choosing and not providing and getting constant verbal abuse including him going into my father’s work kicking off and causing fights with family friends, after that I tried having no contact with him and going though his family but they soon got fed of me having to contact them because he let them down nearly every time it come to having them or paying (his family think the sun shines out of his arse) after this I tried mediation but he failed to attend! After this I decided it was best if he didn’t see them until he’d sorted a court order out that lasted about 3 months until he started contacting me everyday sometimes being nice sometimes being abusive but me being the push over I am give in and arranged to sit down me him and his mother to arrange what’s best for him to have the kids he choose Wednesday and Fridays that lasted a few weeks before he let them down (due to it being the last football game of the season) and stopped paying for them he gives me 30 a week for 2 kids (when it comes to having the kids he works 6 day but when it comes to paying he’s only worked 1 or 2) I did explain to him what would happen before he choose to go to the football match, so I’ve had calls of my oldest nursery saying he is emotionally distressed this could be due to lack of routine I have explained this to there dad but the following week there was more excuses of course he did say he would have them a different but that defeating the object of sorting a routine and I have already told them he was picking them up I have to prepare them as we have massive scream fits due to them not wanting to go but he choose the football! So I sat a thought about it and thought maybe it was best if he just had them one weekend a month so he had a whole month to gets babysitters if he was busy and 3 other weekends and everyday to do whatever he choose I told him this and he’s refusing to do a whole weekend as he plays football and “works” but as I stated earlier he’s work changes to suit I’ve got loads of abuse for this saying am being awkward and he’s refusing to have them that one weekend a month because he think as am coming to the end of my pregnancy I want to go out (asif I’d go out with a new born at home anyway) so I’ve told him to take me to court as I’ve really tried everything and I’ve had enough!!!
Am I being unreasonable and what does everyone else think
P. S he goes round Playing victim saying Am using them as a weapon or I stopped him from seeing them for no reason I have ever tom dick and Harry telling my partner (this baby’s dad) “be careful she’s done this” there’s also no talking to his family as they just dismiss it this has also caused problems with my current partners mother as she’s heard all sorts
Really sorry for post its just breaking my heart