Hi can you post this for me anonymously please – My daughter is now 5 and I wa…

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Hi can you post this for me anonymously please –

My daughter is now 5 and I was in an abusive relationship with her dad, mainly emotionally abusive, manipulative but also physically, sexually and financially. I left the relationship while pregnant and got use to the idea of becoming a single mom. i was only 18 at the time. he was 30. when i went into labour i told him, he pushed his way into the birthing room and bullied his way into being there – he was very nasty during the labour, asking me to beg for the gas and air and sick bucket. i always let him bond with our daughter but it was never enough. him and his mom insisted that they could turn up and take my daughter whenever they wanted to. I explained that they had to let me know before just turning up but they refused and just turned up shouting abuse. In hindsight i should have called the police, but i was young and vulnerable. they blamed me constantly saying i was a rubbish mom and no good and that i had burnt her when feeding her (the little milk blister). I felt hopeless and fell into depression. When she turned 1 they wanted to take her abroad, so i brought the passport and applied for it so they could go. They refused to tell me where abouts they were going or details so i accepted that it wasn’t my right to know. Fast forward years, she is now 5, she likes seeing him to a point, but only for materliastic reasons, he is has a lot of money and a massive house. She has told me that she has seen him and his girlfriend fighting and this scares her. and at one point did not want to go at all. She goes 50% of the time, for 5 nights at a time every other week. He doesn’t do any homework with her, doesn’t attend school events, doesn’t take her to appointments, doesn’t have her at the drop of a hat when he goes on ‘3 week holidays’ and other social events. He doesn’t collect her from school on his 3 school days and she is collected by his mom, who is just as negative about me. My daughter comes back saying negative things about me that has been said to her. I have been unable to go on holiday as he refuses to give me the passport and I have also not been able to go on holiday in the UK as he doesn’t let me have some of his days to go away. I always ensure she can do nice things with him. I have always ensured she saw him on her birthday, christmas etc. However, after putting him on the birth certificate when she was 2 ( i was hoping this would end the abuse ) it goes worse and he prevents me from seeing her on mother’s day and i was unable to see or speak to her on her birthday. I do all the main responsibility parts of parenting but we have been unable to do the fun parts of being a parent/ family. I have a little boy who is 2 with my husband and I just feel so down about it all. I took it to court recently but they aren’t interested really and i have been told that it will probably stay at joint custody as it is in the best intersts of the child. My daughter also wears glasses and since march i have bought 5 pairs because my daughter openly told the optometrist that daddy hid her glasses as he does not want her to wear them. This has been referred to social services, but social are not interested!!!! the cafcass worker is also not interested in any of it, despite convictions and being involved with social services previously due to his other daughter and her mom – allegations of abuse. I don’t know what else to do. I feel so down. He also refuses to communicate about ANYTHING, about arrangements, parties, her wellbeing and it makes everything virtually impossible. I’m at a loss as to what to do 😞
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