Hiya can I have a private post please? I’ve just found out I’m pregnant to my p…
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Hiya can I have a private post please?
I’ve just found out I’m pregnant to my partner I’m 19 nearly 20 and my partner will have just turned 24 when baby is born going by my last period as worked it out to be about 5 weeks pregnant so would be due end of December start of January time. I have two boys to my ex partner ages 1 and 2 and half they will be nearly 2 and 3 and a bit when baby is born my partner is saying that he isn’t ready for a baby and a responsibility like this he scared of being a dad and is scared of turning out like his own dad I’ve tried to reassure him and tell him everything will be fine he’s such a good role model for my own two kids and gets on great with them and my kids adore the ground he walks upon but he’s saying he wants me to have an abortion and if I don’t he will feel like I’m trapping him I’ve giving him two options of walking away or staying and being a dad but he’s adamant this isn’t what he wants he has always said he wasn’t ready for kids right now and I was taking the pill and just happened to get caught so it came as a shock and said that he can’t walk away because he couldn’t do that to his own child so he feels forced into this I’m torn on what to do I love this man with all my heart he’s everything I have ever wanted in life but I also don’t agree with abortions and he knows this and has said that keeping it he will end up resenting me but by having an abortion I know I will need to end my relationship and I will be left with the guilt keeping this baby yeah I may loose my relationship but at least then he might have a change of heart once baby is here and to me that’s a chance that is very much possible I don’t really know what I’m asking for but I guess i just want advice and to hear what other people would do in my situation?
Also my youngest wee boy was born by emergency section due to being breech has anyone fell pregnant a year later and went onto have a successful vbac? I was told by staff at the hospital after my son was born that there is no reason why I couldn’t go on to have any more natural births x
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I no your feel your in a tricky situation when I get stuck in life I always ask myself who is there for me. When no one else is. And I always say my daughter. She is now 7 and no matter what in life that little girl of mine has been with me loving me unconditionally through every step. She’s my sunshine and my rock I would pick her a million times over anyone. Men need to realise that having sex results in a baby and if they try make you feel bad or say there not ready then I don’t believe there ready to be in relationships or having sex. Friends. Some family. Partners they come and go. They make you sad and sometimes they break your heart. But your children fix your heart. They fix the broken time after time. I believe when you get into a relationship you have to accept that baby’s come unexpected sometimes you have to be willing to commit to that person and that means sticking by them through it all especially of your going to be a father role model to previous children you can’t just take what you want and expect certain things. Life of full of the unexpected. If I was you I wouldn’t even think about it my baby is my baby no matter what and if my partner didn’t like it then they can leave. Who wants a man who isn’t ready for you. Who isn’t committed to you. Who doesn’t want the same things as you. X x
You partner is just scared which is normal as was my partner when I first fell pregnant, my partner didn’t want to turn out like his dad so we worked together to get through it.
I had a emergency c-section with my first then went on to have a normal delivery with my second so don’t worry about that. I hope everything works out for you both x
I feel so emotional for both of you… it’s awful to think that your partner automatically assumes that he won’t be good enough for your child poor thing he is the best he can be and they will love him for that you don’t have to have everything all the love in the world will do it seems like he doesn’t know what it’s like to be so truly loved he’s not his dad! Do what you thinks right personally I would keep the baby x
Hes probably shocked hun its such a massive thing to take in its a human your bringing up men take a lot longer than women to come to terms some men dont come round until the baby is born! Xx