It’s not baby related and I’m not sure what I want from this I guess I just need to vent. Sorry it’s long.
I’ve been diagnosed with severe depression and I find myself insanely jealous of my older sister. She’s done everything the right way. She met her partner young but they had years of fun together, lived together, both have successful careers and a car. They now have two beautiful daughters, a nice home and have time for looking after themselves and their relationship. And of course their good jobs. They can afford to live a nice life, I think. I feel I’m the complete opposite. I feel like my life is ruined before it’s even begun. I’m only 23, I got with my ex when I was 17 and had two lovely little boys with him. I had a 5 year long abusive horrible relationship with him. I’ve never got myself any decent qualifications and I’ve never had a job despite how much I’d like one. I’m now a single mother, living on benefits struggling to give my children the life I want for them. I feel like such a terrible person for feeling the way I do. Like I’m bitter. Or I’m ungrateful about my life even though it’s my own fault it’s the way it is. Can someone please tell me how I can stop feeling so jealous of my sister? It eats away at me every time I see her Facebook posting about their happy life. I’d never dream of telling her or taking it out on her I just can’t stand feeling like this.