I am struggling. really struggling. God knows I love my kids but I am just not coping with them. I had really bad post natal with my first who is now five and I worry that the bond was never properly established… She is also extremely hyper active and doesn’t listen – very hard work. I now have a baby as well who despite being a year old still wakes 3 or 4 times a night. I am exhausted. Is it terrible to say that I hate having to look after them when they’re small? the endless, exhausting, monotonous life that comes with raising small children? I hate it. I have no career now, no freedom, no peace! My husband works nights 6 days a week so he is unable to help with the kids or the house… I never really see him and sleep alone every night… Everything has gotten on top of me. My house is a state most of the time, I have no energy, I know I should do more with the kids, go to the park etc but I just randomly burst into tears and i’ve begun to have anxiety attacks out of no where, i’ve lost a lot of weight.. I just want to crawl into bed and stay there forever. I suppose I just need someone to tell me that it gets easier when they’re older. Or that it’s okay and some women just aren’t naturally cut out for raising small children and when they’re older that will be my time to shine… I don’t know. I just see all of these perfect mothers outside the school gates who seem to really have their shit together and here I am walking around like a zombie scarecrow just feeling lonely and like a failure and I just can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel right now tbh. I need some advice. No bashing please it’s pointless – if you’ve nothing nice to say then don’t say anything at all.