Can I have a private post please? My ex and I have children together and we’ve …
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Can I have a private post please?
My ex and I have children together and we’ve been split up a while, it’s mostly amicable apart from the odd occurrence and we’re trying to do what’s best for our children. My problem is my boyfriend, been seeing him almost a year now (yet he won’t confirm our relationship to friends/on Facebook/in any way and I only see him once a week but that’s another issue.) My ex and I have started getting on more amicably, there is no chance of reconciliation, but sometimes we do stuff together with the children e.g. a day out, there’s nothing untoward and we don’t spend any time together without the kids. I’ve always been open about this, and it’s nice for the kids to see us getting on. My boyfriend has started to have a problem with it, makes mean comments and digs whenever I tell him about an upcoming day out to the point afterwards he will ignore me for a day or so. (Happens only 1-2 times a month, doesn’t interfere with the time I spend with boyfriend etc) the reason we do these days out is because we both don’t have many friends or any family so it’s easier for us both to go together with children. It’s never overnight or holidays etc, just a few hours to a farm or children’s event etc. Is this wrong of me? I don’t hide it from boyfriend, tell him all about it afterwards etc. I know it’s probably not the usual thing for ex’s to do but we think it’s good for kids and they love it. Am I in the wrong?
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Can you reply as a comment on my post please?
My boyfriend hasn’t met my children since he’s so reluctant about our relationship (told people were just friends etc) so I didn’t feel comfortable them meeting yet. Plus the one time a week I see him is when children with their dad anyway. If I saw him more, I’d introduce them but he says he’s ‘too busy/tired’ to see me other than the one night a week, that’s why he’s not invited on these trips.
I think it sounds like ur both being fantastic parents and if the bf can’t see this maybe he isn’t right for u and ur family x
Can i just say your children are so lucky to have great parents like use 👏🏻. I think its great that use can be so mature and do this for your children. Most people dont get on with there ex’s and cant even be civil for their children so well done use. As for the boyfriend he needs to grow the fuck up and realise your children come first and always will as someones already said if he doesnt like it he knows where the door is xxxxxxxxx
Your bf needs to grow up. I was seeing a guy that used to go out with his “family” often. Especially on days like mothers day birthdays fathers day ECT.
I loved seeing him with his children but understood his children didn’t need me there. It may be different if you had children together with your current bf but for now he should put up.and shut up. He should be proud to be with you and accept that your children come first.
If you were actually together I could see it as being a problem but once a week relationship and not owning the relationship tells me you may as well carry on the way you are as it won’t last and he don’t deserve to be in the kids lives as he clearly hasn’t got time to put in for you let alone family life
you see him once a week it sounds like he wants a booty call not a relationship if he was that into you he’d make more time for you I don’t blame you for not letting the kids meet him. as for your days out with the kids it’s none of the boyfriends business considering he doesn’t seem to want to commit to any kind of meaningful relationship it’s like he purposely sees you when your kids are with their dad so that he don’t have to bother with them tbh tell the boyfriend to grow up x
So the boyfriend won’t commit to you or even confirm your relationship, basically keeps you his little secret from everyone he knows yet feels he has the right to comment on the friendship you have with your childrens father? I’d be telling him to do one, it’s none of his business and how dare he even think he has a place to say anything? It sounds to me like he’s using you, I’d give him an ultimatum if I were you “confirm our relationship or it’s over” you deserve to be more than his little secret!!
Well done for being amicable with the father of your children, they clearly benefit greatly from seeing you 2 getting along and being able to co parent xx
So you and your kids daddy is doing the best u can for your kids it’s amazing to see that nowadays mind coz not alot of e couples can do that with there kids and your patenter has a problem with it…. u only see your “boyfriend” once a week and he won’t confirm to anyone ur his partner… sounds abit iffy to me I get u mist love your partner but what your doing for it children is amazing … if he has such a big problem I would show him the door your kids are more important then his pettyness it’s not affecting him he sees you once a week … It’s so nice to see kids parents getting along after a brake up x
My mum and dad are split up, have been for absolutly years , my dad came over every night after work when me and my sister lived there and he still dose even though we don’t live there.
There best friends always will be and no matter what anybody thinks off it.
They go out to do stuff together all the time, have tea together and always go to each other with problems. We even go on holidays together ect, it’s a weird family set up yeah, but it works for us and that’s all the matters and my parents would be upset if they lost each others friendship. There’s abolsutly no lovey stuff going on apart from obvious love and respect for eachother for me and my sister.
If anybody they was dateing ever said anything they would get told to grow up or jog on.
The children should always come first!
He sounds abit odd by not wanting to confirm to anybody your in a relationship to be honest. And as for ignoreing you afterwards that’s just childish!
I would think long and hard about weather this person is somebody you actually want in your life and potentionaly your children’s life in the future xxx chin up babe!
My ex stays at my house most weekends. I’m married to someone else. The kids love having him around and he’s always welcome I’d tell your boyfriend to grow up. It’s not like he’s making the effort to be a family anyway. Kids always come first no matter what.
Sounds like your bf is a jealous man having a problem with you having family days out and something is definitely up if he won’t set you as official and only just says your friends, run a mile xx
I think it’s a Lovely thing to do. It’s setting a good example for your children.
Your bf is being Pathetic I’d Tell him to grow up.
Doesn’t sound like a great fit to me….. Maybe hold out for someone who will make an effort…… ANY effort !! Good luck xx
I think what your doing is great, it is healthy to stay friendly for the children and having days out together shows them that u are still a family unit. If your boyfriend can’t handle that then maybe it’s time to find someone a bit more mature!
Have you ever invited your partner to the days out? Maybe he’s felling left out? If it’s a family day then technically he’s family, he may not be jealous he may be hurt by not being invited to go along
When my mum and dad split up after about a year of arguments they wer best friends an spoke to eachother everyday an seen eachother most days, nothing in it just friends an anyone who ever had a problem with it got told where the door was they would never let anyone get in the way of that to the point were my mum actually is a big part of my little sisters life (same dad, different mum) and it’s been the best thing for everyone in our family!
It’s nice to see 2 parents that can still spend time with their kids as a family sounds like your boyfriend is jealous
Tell I’m say wats it got to do with you he only sees u once a week ur life ur children do what the heck use like sod I’m he don’t like it he noes were door is chick xx
Nope, I sometimes will take my kids out with my ex. I hate the blokes guts but I will be civil for my children.
Tell your ‘boyfriend’ to do one! Sounds like , from what you’ve said, he is using you! Move on, carry on having that family time for the sake of your children with your ex and some day you will meet a lovely man who will want you in his life just the way you are x
No,it’s not wrong. Your children need to see Mummy and Daddy being civil to each other. Your boyfriend needs to grow the fuck up
Find another boyfriend! One that accepts that you come as a package.
He doesn’t sound great for you him xx